When being tired isn’t just being tired
I’ve been tired before. Obviously. Everyone gets tired.
But there is a particular kind of exhaustion that I have come to understand differently since learning that I’m autistic and ADHD.
It isn’t simply: I‘ve had a busy week.
It feels more like: I don’t have anything left.
And that’s where the conversation around autistic burnout becomes important.
What is autistic burnout?
Autistic burnout is generally understood as a state of intense physical, mental and emotional exhaustion that can occur when the demands placed on an autistic person consistently exceed the resources they have available to cope.
It can involve things like:
- extreme exhaustion
- reduced ability to manage everyday tasks
- increased sensory sensitivity
- difficulty communicating
- reduced executive functioning
- withdrawal
- increased need for recovery time
- feeling unable to maintain routines or responsibilities that were previously manageable
It’s not simply being tired after a busy day. And it isn’t a sign that someone is lazy or doesn’t care.
The problem is that I can look like I’m coping
This is something I’ve had to think about a lot.
I can work. I can teach. I can meet deadlines. I can be productive. I can get things done. And sometimes I can do an enormous amount.
But that doesn’t necessarily mean the amount I’m doing is sustainable. I think this is one of the traps I’ve fallen into.
If I can do something, I assume I should be able to keep doing it. But capacity isn’t always constant.
The crash afterwards
One thing I’ve come to recognise is what happens after periods of sustained demand.
I can get through something because I have to. I push through. I use all the strategies I have. I hold everything together. And then afterwards, I crash.
Suddenly things that normally feel manageable don’t. Social interaction becomes harder. Sensory input becomes harder. Small tasks feel enormous. My executive functioning disappears. And I need much more time alone.
It’s tempting to look at that and think: What’s wrong with me?
But I’ve started asking a different question: What have I been asking of myself?
Teaching and burnout
This is particularly important when I think about teaching. Teaching can be incredibly rewarding. It can also be relentless.
There are people who need you constantly. There are transitions. Noise. Movement. Planning. Documentation. Unexpected changes. Emotional demands. And very little opportunity to completely switch off.
For an AuDHD teacher, that combination can be particularly demanding. Sometimes I think we talk about teacher wellbeing as though rest is something you add after you’ve completed everything else.
But what if the problem is that the workload and environment themselves are not sustainable?
Burnout isn’t a personal failure
I think this is one of the most important things I’ve learned.
Burnout doesn’t mean you weren’t resilient enough. It doesn’t mean you weren’t organised enough. It doesn’t mean you didn’t care enough. And it certainly doesn’t mean you’re bad at your job.
Sometimes burnout is information. It’s your body and brain telling you that something needs to change. That doesn’t mean every source of stress can immediately be removed.
But it does mean the answer probably isn’t simply: Try harder.
Recovery isn’t always productive
I’ve also had to rethink what recovery means. Sometimes I want to turn recovery into another task. I’ll make a plan. I’ll organise myself. I’ll decide what I should do to recover. And suddenly recovery has become another project.
Sometimes recovery is much simpler. Less stimulation. Less expectation. Less decision making. More time. More quiet. More doing things that genuinely restore rather than things that simply look restful.
Learning my warning signs
I don’t think I can prevent every period of burnout. But I can become better at noticing what happens before I reach that point.
For me, that means paying attention to changes in things like:
- how much social interaction I can tolerate
- how easily overwhelmed I become
- how difficult everyday tasks feel
- how much sensory input bothers me
- how much recovery time I need
- whether I’m functioning because I genuinely have capacity or because I’m forcing myself through
I’m still learning. But noticing those signs earlier gives me a chance to respond before I reach complete exhaustion.
🎧 Listen to Episode 5
This post accompanies Episode 5 of the That AuDHD Teacher podcast, where I explore autistic burnout, what it can look like, and how I’ve come to understand exhaustion differently through an AuDHD lens.
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